All My Fault: A Davekat Fanfiction
by AlchemicLove
Summary: Years after everything ended, Karkat still blames himself.
1. Chapter One: It's Still, All My Fault

**All My Fault. : A DaveKat Fanfiction**

**Quick Note: This takes place a few years after the game ended, on the meteor.**

Also, thanks for reading! ~AlchemicLove

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I sat against the wall of my bathroom, to stunned to move. I couldn't take his eyes off of the horrified human staring at the disgusting mess that was myself.

"K-Karkat?!" Dave stuttered with more emotion than I had ever heard from him. Not that I heard it all that well. It was distant, and faint. An echo. I guess I knew why Dave sounded so scared. I knew the disgusting mutated slosh, feebly pulsing through my veins was on full display against the white tiles of the floor.

**Great. Now you've made yet another person upset.**

I cringed away from the voice that I knew came from no one but myself. I knew it was telling the truth. I looked down, staring at the burning crimson lines that ran across my far too skinny body, stretching from exposed rib to exposed rib. My sweater lay on the floor next to me. I stared at the cuts, and then at the razor in my hand, still surprised by how bad what I had done to myself looked. It should have hurt far more than it did, but even this shallow pain was better than nothing. At least it _wasn't_ nothing.

**At least now everyone else won't have to deal with your self-pitying bullshit.**

I nodded, agreeing weakly with the voice as stared at the cuts once more, and then stared at nothing. Why am I not moving..? I couldn't figure out why I wasn't simply putting bandages over the disgusting marks of self hatred, hiding my grotesque blood, and pretending everything was alright. I was going to make even more people hate me; I was going to drive even more people away with my inability to function like anything close to normal. My vision began to blur. I smiled, a small, bittersweet smile. Maybe this time I wouldn't hurt anyone else.

But I heard another voice, along with the one in my own mind.

"KARKAT?!" It sounded like yelling, but it seemed to echo as if it was far, far away. "SHIT. KARKAT DON'T YOU DARE FUCKING LEAVE ME YOU-"

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I woke up feeling like I had been trampled by about twenty-hundred different hoof beasts. I blinked in discomfort at even the dim lighting of the red-walled room. My head hurt. Less so than before, but still not as much as it should have, my stomach burned. I moved my head slightly, and tried miserably to sit up. I failed. I held onto the sheets while I waited for the room to stop being a god damned acrobat. Something was wrong here. I looked down a myself to find that I had my red sweater on, not my usual black one. I noted that I was wearing someone else's boxers as I slowly pieced together the shattered memories, recalling what had happened. I remembered my own candy colored blood on the white tiles of my own bathroom, and the shock of Dave's entrance. I slowly pulled the sweater up, to reveal that my chest had been neatly bandaged. That's what was wrong. I was here, and I didn't want to be.

What happened..? How long had I been unconscious? But where exactly is "here"? I sat up slowly, having already remembered what my stomach looked like last time I saw it. I still cringed, and laid back down. I don't fucking care where I am.. The problem is that i'm here at all.. I suddenly felt tears well in my eyes.

**You can't even die correctly. You're such a fuck up that you didn't succeed in taking your own life.**

I struggled to contain a sob. I don't want to be here. I'm done. I rolled to my side, ignoring the dull burning on my stomach, and heard something between a feral snarl and a sob escape my throat. I stifled it with one of the red silky pillows. I allowed myself to wallow in my own pity. I hate myself so much. All I do is fuck up, and pity myself. Because of me.. everyone had died. They all knew it was my fault. They all hated me. I sobbed harder, and ended up coughing. I tasted my own disgusting, cherry colored blood. I don't know how long I remained there, sobbing all my self hatred into that appley-smelling pillow until I felt light-headed. And even then I kept going.

I was still at it when I felt strong arms wrap gently around my hips, avoiding my stomach. I gasped and tensed up, which turned out to be a awful idea because my stomach began to burn more than it had previously. I tried to stop the tears rolling down my cheeks out of habit. It was bad enough that I pitied myself so much. I didn't need anyone else to do so as well. Still tense and scared, I turned my head around to see Dave Strider.

"W- What the fuck are you doing.." I had intended to sound indignant. I had intended to seem alright. But the question came out of my mouth hoarse, broken, and quiet.

Dave didn't say anything as he sat up, and pulled me onto his lap slowly. I was far too tired to resist. He had already seen the pathetic red streaming down my face. I looked up at the prick, fully expecting a joke about how much of a shitty person I am, or about how much of a wimp I am. But Dave remained silent, so I decided that was alright. I dried my eyes on the sleeve of the red sweater, no longer bothering to hide the fact that I had been bawling my eyes out. I shifted, slowly, and sat up. I wanted to be alone. I said nothing as I began to slide out of the bed, which I now knew was Dave's. I sat on the edge if the bed, staring at the floor. Guilt settled in as I realized I was about to leave without providing any explanation for my actions, or without giving any thanks for whatever the blonde 16 year-old had done for me. I wasn't grateful. I wasn't happy that he had saved my life. I wasn't happy that I was still here.

"Sorry." I was shocked that those words hadn't come out of my own mouth. They had come out of the human's instead. I stared at Dave, to tired to react with much more than a disbelieving stare.

"For what..? You didn't do anything wrong." My stupid voice. It was still hoarse and weak and I hated it. "I should owe you for saving me." This lie came out less raspy. I cleared my throat, and Dave sighed.

"For saving you, yeah.. Look, I know it was selfish. I know you wanted to die. I didn't have the right to change that decision for you." Dave sounded like he had thought a lot about this. "But I.. I couldn't just let you die." Dave sounded so scared and so guilty.

**You're the one that did this to him.**

I felt tears well in my crimson eyes yet again.

"It's alright." My acceptance came out as a whisper. Dave removed his glasses to reveal his equally crimson eyes filling with strange clear tears. His response was even quieter than mine had been, as he looked me in the eyes and asked,

"Why..?"

And I broke.

I threw myself back into Dave's arms. "IT'S ALL MY FAULT." I shrieked as I felt Dave pull me carefully into his chest. "EVERYONE'S DEAD AND IT'S ALL MY FUCKING FAULT." Between sobs I screamed at the top of my lungs into Dave's shirt. "I WAS THEIR LEADER. I WAS SUPPOSED TO PROTECT THEM AND LEAD THEM TO VICTORY BUT I FAILED." I dug my claws into Dave's chest, staining it red with more pathetic tears. "ALL I CAN DO IS PITY MY SORRY SELF. I COULDN'T KEEP THEM SAFE AND THEY'RE ALL FUCKING DEAD." My throat was raw and my stomach burned but I couldn't have cared less. "THEY'RE ALL DEAD DAVE. AND I FUCKING KILLED THEM." I sobbed and choked.

And then I screamed. I screamed everything I had left into Dave's chest. All of the hate, and all of the regret until my voice cracked and I couldn't make a sound.

But I still didn't feel any better. The others were all still dead. It was still my fault.

And I still cried. The others were still dead. And it was still, all my fault.

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I love all of you so much, Thanks again for reading, i'll be sure to update soon!

~AlchemicLove


	2. Chapter Two: What If?

Thank you so much for reading! I know how hard it is to love a fanfiction, but have it NEVER update, so i'll be sure to work hard on cranking out the chapters! I also apologize for the mediocre writing, i'm doing my best! I love and appreciate each and every single one of you readers, and leave a review if you feel like it! They really make me happy, and they are the source of nearly all of my motivation! xD

Thanks again, ~AlchemicLove

**IMPORTANT NOTE: This fanfiction will change point of view every chapter.**

**ANOTHER IMPORTANT NOTE: I forgot to mention, that this is a timeline where, after the victory against Jack Noir, nearly all of the main characters died, (because i'm an angsty little shit) with the exceptions of Karkat, Dave, Rose, Kanaya, John, and Tavros.**

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I stood, frozen in the doorway to Karkat's bathroom. I had wanted to come over and check on the angry troll; he hadn't been returning my pesterchum messages or phone calls, and I hadn't seen him around the meteor. I don't know what I expected. But it sure as hell wasn't this. I was staring at my best friend, covered in blood, on the floor of his bathroom.

"K-Karkat?!" This couldn't happen. One of my last friends in all of these stupid and fucked up timelines couldn't die. But even as I watched the bright red seep from the deep, jagged tears across Karkat's stomach, I couldn't move.

I stood, unable, no matter how much I screamed at my body, to move. I stupidly stayed put, frozen in the doorway to Karkat's bathroom. I watched Karkat nod at something I couldn't see or hear. The urge to vomit steadily grew alongside my terror, and I saw a small smile spread across Karkat's face. That tiny, terrifying smile snapped me out of my daze.

"KARKAT?!" I regained my ability to move and flash stepped forward, closing the distance between me and the small troll. "SHIT. KARKAT DON'T YOU DARE FUCKING LEAVE ME YOU ASSHOLE" I shouted at my friend. This could not happen. Karkat could not die.

I picked up Karkat's now completely limp body rougher than I should have in my panic, paying no attention to the blood staining my white shirt. I checked for pulse. I found it. A feeble, and faint thud under my two fingers. He had passed out. I felt tears sting my eyes as I ran out of Karkat's pod, and to my own. I screamed for the others.

"KARKAT'S HURT. PLEASE FUCKING HELP." I bit back sobs, and paid no mind to the texan accent that slipped into my voice. I sprinted and flash stepped across the meteor to my own pod. I needed to move faster. _Karkat was dying in my fucking arms_. I rounded the last corner and saw that Kanaya and Rose were already there, looking confused. I came to a stop, still clutching Karkat to my chest. I gasped for breath, but it came out a choked sob. "H-help Karkat!" The words stuttered past my lips, terrified and noncoherent. I couldn't breathe. Kanaya stepped forward, looking scared. She had her lipstick out.

"Dave?! What happened to Karkat?!" She sounded just a terrified as I was.

"I don't know.. just help him!" I sounded so desperate. It stood to reason, I was desperate. Karkat couldn't just up and die. Not after everything that we all survived. Kanaya took Karkat's limp body gently from my trembling arms. I forced myself to let go. Kanaya would help him.

"I will take care of him. Do not worry." Kanaya had changed her tone; she sounded confident, although I doubted that was how she honestly felt. She looked at Rose, but whatever meaning that was behind said look was lost on me. Kanaya walked into my own pod, it was the closest, and I realized I should have just stayed at Karkat's pod. I mentally kicked myself for my own stupidity. But That wasn't important right now. I stared at the door Kanaya had just closed, shaking, my cool kid act long forgotten.

"W-wait a min-" Rose calmly put her hand on my shoulder. I flinched away.

"S-sorry.. I- I just.." I took a shaky deep breath. "There was just so much blood.." I tried to apologize and piece myself back together, but all I managed was to make myself feel worse when the attempt failed. I brought my shaking hands up to rub my face, realizing I had lost my shades. Said realization somehow made me feel worse. I removed my red-stained hands from over my eyes to look down and immediately feel nauseous again. The white portion of my broken record shirt was completely stained bright red. Rose observed me, no doubt thinking of about twenty different therapies I would need. But I wasn't the one who needed help. I needed _**to**_help.

"We should help Kanaya.." My voice was quieter than I had meant it to be. I wanted my shades. I felt tears welling yet again in my eyes.

"It'll be alright Dave." Rose replaced her hand on my shoulder. I managed to contain the urge to slip away from the contact once more. "I'm sure Kanaya is more than capable of caring for Karkat." She kept her tone neutral. I suddenly found that irritating.

"How the hell can you be so calm..?" I was angry. "How the hell.. at A TIME LIKE THIS?! KARKAT MAY BE FUCKING _DEAD_. DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?! DO YOU NOT FUCKING CARE?!" I didn't realize I was yelling until I heard my own voice echo down the halls of the meteor. Shit. I hadn't mean to get mad. I needed to calm the fuck down. Rose was trying to help. "Wait.. shit.. sorry." I tried once again to pull some remnants of my normal, calm self out of the rubble that made up my sanity at the moment. "Fuck Rose, there was just a shit ton of blood." Rose didn't seem angry or hurt by my outburst, she looked as if she had seen it coming.

"Let's get you cleaned up." I resisted the urge to shout again at Rose's calm demeanor. I didn't need the help. Karkat did. I noticed I had started trembling again. I may actually need to sit down for a sec. I bit my lip to contain more tears that sprung into my eyes, burning my nose for no apparent reason. Just let Karkat be fucking okay.. I just need Karkat to be okay.

Rose said nothing else as she led the way to the pod her and Kanaya shared. She opened the door and walked in, leaving me in the doorway. Rose went directly into another room, and I stepped past the threshold. I was suddenly really fucking tired. My eyes burned, and I wanted to go back and check on Karkat. _Karkat could be fucking dead, and I would have no idea_. I shook my head, trying to stop thinking about the troll. He was in good hands. I would only get in the way of Kanaya. I don't know shit about first aid past the fact that, if it hurts, you ignore it.

_What if Karkat really dies..?_

I froze. The reality of that sunk in. The god damned tears stung my dry eyes once more. Suddenly furious, I whirled around and threw all of my frustration at my inability to help into a punch that landed squarely on a wall.

"FUCK." I swore violently and and loudly as held my hand, dark bruises already forming on my knuckles. "Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck." The tears hadn't gone away, they still rolled down my cheeks. "Fuck…" Anger subsiding, I dropped my hand to my side, pain forgotten. I stared at the red on my shirt again.

_What if he dies….?_

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Sorry, I had planned on this chapter being longer, but I wanted to get it out tonight! I won't be able to update at all this weekend, i've got shit tons of stuff to do (TTATT)

I'll also apologize for the lack of editing I did on this page, like I said, I wanted to get this out =)

Again, thanks for reading, and putting up with my shitty metaphors! ~AlchemicLove


	3. Chapter Three: What Rose Knows

Psh, homework? What homework? I'm totally not writing this instead of doing algebra! What are you talking about?

~AlchemicLove

**Note: I'm going to continue Dave's POV this chapter, sorry for the confusion!**

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I wasn't sure how long I had been staring at my stained shirt before I realized I was being watched. Rose had been standing in the hallway to the room she went to; She was leaning against the doorframe, analyzing me from across the den.

I couldn't think of any excuses, so I just walked over to Rose as she motioned for me to follow her.

"Sorry.." was all I mumbled when she handed me a plain white T-shirt and a pair of basketball shorts. I stared uncomprehendingly at the articles of clothing, then at Rose.

"You'll need those until Kanaya can get some of your own for you." Rose continued to watch all of my emotions and movements carefully.

"Thanks." Another quiet reply. I mentally kicked myself for acting to immature; I needed to be better about this. I wasn't the one who was hurt; I didn't need anyone else worrying. "Really, thanks Rose, it means a lot." I tried to amend my one-worded reply. Rose offered a small smile, and showed me to the bathroom.

"Clean yourself up, and i'll take a look at your hand. Hand me your clothes as well, i'll take care of them." By take care of, I assumed she meant trash. There was no amount of bleach that could remove the cough syrup red from my shirt.

"Thanks" I repeated, genuinely grateful. I stepped into the bathroom, shut the door quietly, and took off my shirt and skinny jeans. The pants were stained too. I grimaced as I saw the red stain had seeped through my shirt, and onto my chest. I'd have to shower. I made a face yet again at the realization that i'd have to go without underwear in the shorts Rose gave me; her and Kanaya would have no reason to own any men's underwear or clothing. I handed all of the clothes to Rose around the cracked open door, and shut it again. I jumped as I looked at my own reflection in the mirror.

My eyes were red, almost as much so as the irises in them. I had Karkat's blood on my chest, as well as some that had splattered onto my face. How had that even happened? I shook my head, trying to stop the thoughts I knew would lead to worry about the small troll. I wasn't successful. _What am I supposed to do if Karkat dies..? What will the others think? They'll blame me, of course. If I had gotten to Kanaya faster, or just stayed at Karkat's pod, he would have been fine. _I gritted my teeth, attempting yet again to put an end to the irrational self-blame.

But suddenly I wondered, _what had happened?_

I had seen the blade in Karkat's hand.. So it wasn't a question of who or how, but _why_? What had driven Karkat to do something like this to himself..? I shook my head yet again, ending that train of thought before it left the station. That was Karkat's business. None at all of mine.

I stepped away from the mirror and turned on the shower. I focused on the tasks immediately in front of me: using the girly-smelling shampoo and scrubbing my scalp, washing away the nearly brown stain on my chest and face, and taking care to not move my swollen hand. I inspected my left hand, my wrist had swollen and dark purple and sickly green-yellow bruises continued to worsen across my knuckles. I had probably broken at least my wrist.

I didn't stay long under the rush of hot water. I needed more things to keep me busy and to keep my thoughts away from Karkat. I stepped out of the shower and turned off the water, taking a cream-colored towel off the rack to my right. I dared to look at myself again in the mirror. My eyes were less red, and the stain across my chest had faded a great deal, but wasn't completely gone. I felt a shit ton better; I had omitted any thoughts of Karkat while I was in the shower. I remained focussed on simple tasks. I toweled off thoroughly. I ran my fingers through my light hair after I ruffled it with a towel, smoothing down the gravity-defying spikes. I pulled on the woman's t-shirt, and the basketball shorts. I took a deep breath, collecting my thoughts and preparing for the onslaught of therapeutic questions that were about to spew from Rose. I opened the door, making a mental note to look for my shades sometime soon.

Rose was sitting on the couch looking tired. She was reading a book, and my closer inspection revealed it was in Alternian. I walked over to her and flopped down into the cushions. Rose closed her book. I mentally prepared for the imminent interrogation, keeping my face devoid of emotion.

"How is your hand? Not well, I can infer, based on the dent you left in the wall." A small smile tugged at the corners of Rose's mouth.

"I think I broke something" I answered awkwardly, it really did hurt like hell. "Sorry, about the dent, that is." Rose nodded, accepting my short apology. She picked up what looked like a small first aid kit from the table beside the couch and set her book aside.

"Do you mind if i take a look at it? Kanaya has taught me fairly well about injuries such as this one." Rose seemed to be holding off on addressing the elephant in the room for awhile longer; I was fine with that. I shrugged and held out my hand. The swelling around my wrist had gotten worse. Rose admirably kept her face as clean of emotion.

"You seem to have broken some part of your wrist, and at least one of your fingers." Rose kept her tone just as unblemished as her face. She took out some antiseptic wipes and carefully cleaned off where I had ripped the skin on my knuckles. I winced. Rose continued to clean, and then wrapped white bandages thickly around my wrist and hand. The cotton bound my fingers together. I stared at the clean bandages, zoning out. It seemed to be forever before Rose broke the silence. "Karkat will be fine."

I jumped. Damn it. She managed to get me unsuspicious for five damn seconds and here comes the "therapy". I stuttered,

"Y-yeah." God damn it. There was another brief moment of silence.

"If it isn't too much to ask, it would probably be best if we went to collect something for Karkat to wear when he regains consciousness." Rose busied herself with putting the leftover bandages and wipes back into the small first aid kit.

I froze up. I knew Rose wanted to see what had happened, and even her excuse had a valid point.

"Yeah sure, I think I lost my shades in his pod too." I struggled to keep my voice steady and my face stoic.

Rose stood and walked calmly to the door. Everything she had said, and everything she had done had been measured, and careful. She was tiptoeing cautiously around my head, finding out what she needed, and leading me (un)knowingly to recovery. I knew Rose to well to not be aware of what she was doing. Hell, the sixteen-year-old probably knew me better than I did myself. Her Pesterchum tag was "TentacleTherapist" for a reason. I sighed and stood up, trying to keep all thoughts of where we were going out of my head until we got there. I followed Rose through the hall, making another mental reminder for myself: keep tabs on what Rose knows, and what she doesn't.

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Thank you guys, as always, for reading! I tried to make this page a bit longer; I had wanted to keep going but I HAD to get this published tonight because I've been gone all weekend! I love you (insert correct gender labels here)s so much, thanks again!

~AlchemicLove


	4. Chapter Four: The Others

I've decided on the slow and steady pace of one new page per week, because of finals at school and my amazing skills of hella procrastination. OH BOY. Sorry for making everyone wait, i'll be sure to keep this pace from now on!

~AlchemicLove

**Yet another important note: More Dave's POV, YAY!**

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I successfully zoned out while following Rose across the meteor, keeping my blank, thoughtless gaze glued to the ground in front of me. I kept myself in this state until I noticed the trail of blood along the side of where we were walking. I immediately felt my stomach contract, and attempted to swallow back the greasy burning in the back of my throat. I hunched my shoulders squeezed my eyes shut and pretended to have not noticed the trail of scarlet stains. Holy fuck what I would give to have my aviators on right now. I ran into Rose's back; I hadn't seen that we had arrived.

"Do you think you'll be alright to come inside with me?" Rose asked pointlessly. She knew I couldn't handle it. I wondered what exactly she was testing with this inquiry.

"Nah, i'm going to stay out here if that's okay." I kept my voice steady. "Tell me if you see my glasses anywhere in there, alright?" Rose gave a small smile of approval before she answered,

"Very well." Rose walked inside, seemingly unaware of the blood she was stepping over.

I backed up until I hit the wall across the hallway, and slid down it. I pulled my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms loosely around them, feeling like an idiot for how stupid I probably looked in the light green womens undershirt. I rested my head on my knees and zoned out yet again. I realized, it had only been about two hours since I found Karkat in his pod. It felt like it should have been weeks ago.

I lost track of time, and didn't move until I heard quick, light footsteps coming from the opposite direction of Rose's pod. I lifted my head to stare at the corner the footsteps were coming from and watched a white t-shirted 16-year-old come around. The nerdy teen was out of breath, and nearly passed me, but looked down just in time to see a heap of emotional wreckage in basketball shorts sitting on the ground.

"D-Dave?!" John sounded scared, and I could guess it was because of the pure amounts of shit I looked like.

"What's up man?" I forced a relaxed tone. He had probably heard about what happened from Rose while I was in the shower. John kneeled down in front of me and looked me in the eyes. I pretended I had my shades on. It helped; I kept a stony expression. It didn't matter much though, my eyes were probably still red and puffy.

John suddenly got a really serious expression plastered on his face. It didn't suit him.

"Dave, are you okay?" And suddenly I realized why Rose had brought me if she had known I wouldn't go inside. **That bitch. She wanted to get what she needed through god damn John.**

"Yeah bro i'm fine." I swallowed another "FUCK". I didn't want to talk to anyone. John let out a long sigh and moved to sit against the wall next to me. "Uh, hey John, i'm really tired, and I really don't want to talk at the moment, or probably for like, the next ten years." John finally grinned.

"So Rose was right, even I won't be able to get anything out of you." I knew Rose had put John up to this. Fucking shit.

"Yeah, uh, sorry." I was pissed at Rose for trying to get me to talk through my bro. I let out a sigh to match John's. I might as well try some small talk. My ears were ringing in the silence of the meteor. "So, where's Tavros?" I waited a few moments for an answer, but it never came. I peeked at him out of the corner of my eye to see him staring at the wall parallel to the one we were sitting against. John seemed to be having trouble finding the right words. He said quietly,

"Tavros kinda.. broke.. when Gamzee died…" I frowned.

"Come again?"

"He.." John trailed off.

"You're scaring me bro, did he die or something?"

"No! He.. well.. followed in Gamzee's footsteps.."

"What the hell are you talking about John?" I was losing patience. Rose needed to hurry the fuck up.

"Tavros started eating sopor slime." John deadpanned and didn't look at me; he fidgeted uncomfortably. I was speechless. How had he..? I had seen the paraplegic only a month ago…

"When was this?" I gave up on hiding behind my stoic facade; John knew I was fucked up.

"A few weeks ago.. He worked up the nerve to go into Gamzee's pod after all these years.. I think that's when he started.." John looked scared and lost, nearly identical to me. "He only wears Gamzee's clothes and he's been locked in his own pod. I tried to tell him what happened.. but he wouldn't come out.."

"Shit.."

"Dave everyone's leaving..." John's voice was wavering, I could tell he was holding back tears. "I don't know what to do.." John put his head down, between his knees. "Karkat might die, and Tavros is long gone.." He was starting to choke up.

"Hey, John, a bunch of your friends are still here.." Fuck. "I'm here, and Kanaya, and Rose are, and i'm positive Karkat will be fine." I felt my nose begin to burn and I resisted the urge to smack myself for crying for the fourth time that day.

"But what about the others Dave?! What about Aradia, and Sollux, and Eridan, and Feferi, and Terezi, and Gamzee, and Vriska, and Nepeta, and Equius, and Jade, and Roxy.. and.. Jane.. and Bro..?" John had started shaking, sobs shuddering out of him. He shouldn't have isolated himself; he had been thinking too much about everything and everyone. I had been able to move past what that game had done to all of us.. I had hoped the others could do the same.

"John, Karkat's going to be fine. And Tavros, well, he is still here, he'll just be like Gamzee was, except, um. Bad analogy. Shit." I was half convincing myself as I tried to comfort John. "At this point, there's really nothing we can do to change the outcome of our timeline." I steadied my voice, forcing the last of my fake confidence out into it. I sighed and leaned against John's shoulder, awkwardly trying to provide some sort of comfort. I stared at the opposite wall, letting my mind wander.

John and I had gone out once; it hadn't worked out. Although that was a bit of a sore subject, we had promised each other that our past wouldn't fuck up our friendship.

John should move into a pod closer to the others'. I don't think he handled the isolation very well.

Small thoughts related to John floated around my head until I saw the door in front of us open. Rose stepped quietly across the doorframe, looking pale and sick despite her calm expression. She took my glasses out from the small pile of Karkat's clothes she had brought out of the room. She extended her hand with them in it, towards me.

"I retrieved your glasses, along with a small amount of Karkat's clothing. I also," Rose paused,"I also... cleaned up the bathroom, incase Karkat should choose to move back here once he is well again." Rose's tone remained as controlled as ever, cold, neutral, and intellectual. I stood up slowly, pulling a face slightly as my knees and shoulders complained about the sudden movement. I glanced back at John, and shot a meaningful glare at Rose. She had probably set this up to help the both of us, if not entirely to benefit John. Rose returned the favor with a tight, forced smile. I reached out and took my glasses from her hand, immediately putting them on. The security of my newly tinted vision was comforting; I felt better.

"Thanks Rose." I reached down to help John up; he had quickly wiped away his tears and had been busying himself with cleaning his glasses. John looked at the hand for a moment, then accepted the help, grabbing it and pulling himself to his feet.

"So, any news on Karkat?" John stared at his feet awkwardly. I had begun to answer with a no, when Rose cut me off.

"Kanaya had contacted me while I was in Karkat's room, she explained that Karkat will not be waking up for a long while, but that he should be alright." Rose offered a genuine smile, much different than the forced one from moments ago. I nearly choked on air, and John's reaction had been similar. _Karkat will be fine. _I smiled back at Rose, feeling hope bubble up in my chest.

"Thank you Rose." I repeated my thanks, this time without the hidden venom. (which had been caused by Rose's planning) I smiled an honest smile for what felt like the first time in years, although I knew it had only been around two and a half hours.

_Karkat will be alright._

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I swear I had meant to finish this page earlier! However.. there was.. a lovely.. _COMPANY PICNIC IN NIGHTVALE _that I had to attend. Another reminder: I'll be updating once a week until summer break, when i'll have more time to write. By then, the pages should be longer as well as more frequent!

SOOO sorry for the wait! Especially for such a short page! ~AlchemicLove


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